Big boat on the ocean
11:35 a.m. | 2006-09-07
Having no expectations can be a godsend and other times can be not so good. I cant remember if I really had any for my cruise to the Bahamas. I probably didnt considering that my sister was coming along with her in-laws. They were the ones that planned the entire trip, however, it was planned half-assed.
So there were three days on the ship, one of which was spent on CocoCay, the other on Nassau in the Bahamas. It was cloudy and overcast for most of the trip so sunning was out. And it rained on CocoCay, so there wasnt much to done about that day except to get ready for the formal dinner party on the ship. I had gone out of my way to find a nice cocktail dress for the dinner, however I brought along the dress I found for my grandfather's funeral just incase I needed to dress up for dinner or something else. I went down to Orlando the day before the trip to pack up with my sister and showed her the dress that I bought. I can tell that she didnt like it, that either 1) it was tacky or 2) that it was too sexy. I had shown the dress to other s who thought it was perfect, just great for the trip, but my sister wasnt exactly please with it. She used the excuse, "it's not what I would wear".
So on that day when we were getting dressed, she asked to see the other dress she saw hanging in the closet. I told her it was plain, that no one liked it (which was true, my family members at the funeral didnt like my dress at all, said that was the reason I was single...) and that I brought it for another dinner. If I wore it tonight, what would I wear the next night? Yeah, that shit didnt fly. So we started to argue, and finally I gave up and put the other dress on. She wouldnt say if she thought it was tacky or too sexy or provocative or what. She kept mentioning her in-laws. Eitherway I was upset about it, along with how we were treated by her in-laws and still thinking about ending things with that guy.
Speaking of the devil, I slept with him again, thinking that the relationship is purely FWB. Well that was kinda it. He started talking about his ex, and now I dont know what his deal is. He's got baggage, but not really. He complained about he stuff that gets left behind, like earrings, and other personal items, then later when I got back from the cruise, he discusses his breakup with her. Even asked me why she didnt want to be friends with him, and I couldnt understand why he didnt know. Especially if she broke things off with him. But I guess it depends on what expectations you have. I would never expect someone I break up with to be friends with me. In some cases yes, but there is also the no option. Just because it's hard to see that person as a friend. And he mentions that he doesnt have many friends, and I was so tempted to say 'because you keep sleeping with them', but I didnt. I feel that maybe their situation is what Im in right now, he's doing the same thing he did with her, except maybe she twisted his arm into a relationship, which I wouldnt do. I cant. Im not good at it. But I know that avoidance angers him, and I know just to be upfront and to the point. Not to just disappear. Because he would never hunt me down, just complain to another girl about it.
I feel sorry for him in a way. I feel stupid that I got sucked into this circus that he's got going on, but it cant be helped. I can just be there, and maybe things will change to where it will work out and none of us will get hurt. Maybe we can stay friends and I can move on.
I suggest: Get the special treatment you deserve (or at least what you paid for on the curise!) Go all out with Australian wines and strawberry margaritas. Dont worry about the in-laws, and if you do, just by them drink.